Why I’m Choosing to Love My Body

The original title of this post was going to be “Why I’m Not Dieting Anymore”. I had gotten to a really good place with my body and my weight. Was I fluffier than I had been a couple years ago. Absolutely. But was my life also substantially better than it was two years ago. Hell yeah.

So I was content. Maybe not 100% happy with the ol’ soul holder, but at least content enough to give myself some room to enjoy chocolate and let the dieting go to the wayside.

But then I stepped on a scale. And I had gained over 30 pounds in about 6 months. I was my highest weight – ever.


…and then I got to work and ate 4 King’s Hawaiian rolls (which are NOT gluten free in case you were wondering).

So I sat down with myself and asked myself some hard questions. When was I going to love myself? Was it going to be when I had lost the 30 pounds I had gained? Or not until I had lost the 30 more that I wanted to shed? Was it going to be when I started going to the gym consistently? Or when I had an effortlessly fit body?

Or maybe, just maybe, could it be right now? Right in this very moment – all overweight, unhappy, XXX pounds of me?

So I made a choice – I chose to love myself right now. And here’s why.

Choose Body Love

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Diets suck.

The painful truth? Diets absolutely, positively SUCK. I hate depriving myself of the things I love. I hate telling myself no, and feeling guilty when I “cave in”. I hate planning out all my food all the time. It’s just the worst.

When I get to the point where I hate my body, I diet. Traditionally, we don’t choose to start a hardcore diet when they are in 100% loving their body, right? So when I’m not feeling the fluff? – that’s when the full steam ahead mentality comes in. The one where I go 2 weeks without chocolate and hate my life.

But when I love myself, I live. Sometimes my love moments are a salad. Sometimes they’re a salad with croutons. And sometimes it’s just croutons. But it’s all done with love and not malice. And it’s so much more refreshing.

Related post // 60+ Resources for Healthy Living


Hating myself is hard.

Hating myself isn’t refreshing. It’s exhausting, maddening, and counterproductive. Click To Tweet

Speaking of refreshing – hating myself isn’t refreshing. In fact, it’s the exact opposite. It’s exhausting. It’s maddening. And it’s counterproductive.

And honestly, I hate hating myself.

It makes me less productive. It makes me less confident. And it’s just downright tiring to fight my own negativity all the time. I mean, I can only tell myself that I’m ugly so many times until I actually start to believe it.

And tbh – I’m too impatient to wait for my body to reach the “ideal standard” that I used to think was worthy of love. Because I know that it’s going to take hard work to get there (which I willing to put in!) but I might as well go ahead and start practicing the self-love stuff now right?

Related post // What I Learned from Taking a Solo Vacation (hint: it’s self-love)


I like to give society the middle finger sometimes.

Society’s whole gimmick is making you feel like a pile of poo. I mean we have products that tell us our eyelashes aren’t long enough, that our stomachs are too round and bumpy. Our feet are too smelly! Our lips too thin! Heck, we even POOP wrong! (if you haven’t checked out the Squatty Potty then please do so now. I’ll wait.)

And I’m pretty tired of being told that everything about me is wrong and needs to be changed.

So the little feminist in me is hopping up on her soapbox and giving a moving speech about how I’m amazing just the way I am, right here right now. I don’t need to be fixed, changed, or modified. I don’t need your creams, pills, powders, or *magic* solutions.

I’m a badass, today, in this moment. Full stop. And that’s that.

Then she throws up her hand like that sassy emoji (the one they call a waitress), drops the mic, and goes and eats a cheeseburger and fries. With a milkshake.

Because balance is just so much better.

Related post // How to Find Balance When You Feel Overwhelmed (psst. There’s 18 different ways listed!)


My body isn’t inherently bad.

It took me a while to figure out and accept this one (and a lot of days I still don’t). But bodies – tall, short, fat, round, slim, lean, bumpy, and lumpy – are not inherently good or bad. They just are.

In fact, our bodies aren’t anything more than a beautiful way to hold our souls. And rather than criticizing and trying to change something that holds something so beautiful, why don’t we celebrate that uniqueness? Your casing is blue? Cool mine is yellow with stars on it! You’ve got a few rolls? Sweet! I’ve got some cellulite!

From stretch marks to bruises. Tattoos to surgery scars. Our bodies tell the physical stories of our souls.

Bodies aren’t inherently good or bad. They are just a beautiful way to hold our souls. Click To Tweet

So friend. I’m choosing love today. Love for myself. Love for my body and all it’s overweight, rolly, stretch marked glory. Because it’s holding something pretty special – all my hopes, dreams, and passions.

And that’s definitely worth loving.

So how are you going to celebrate your body today? Let me know down below!

And until next time,


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  • This is probably one of my most favorite self-love posts EVER and I just love every word of it. I can relate so much. Sometimes I look back on photos of me being 15-20lbs less and I think about how I still didn’t think it was “good enough”. Where does it stop?! Loving my body, the way it moves, the way it carries me, the way it allows me to eat all the yummy things I want, has made me really happy. You are so beautiful and literally glowing in all of your photos, so I’d say you’re doing something right! <3

    • This makes my heart so happy!! I definitely look at old photos and realize that it’s not the size or shape of my body that determines my level of self-love, it’s my mind and mindset!! That realization is enough to make any girl glow!

  • Jasmine Hunter

    Love this! I have always had a love-hate relationship with my body… mostly, hate. I can’t ever remember a time where I was happy with it. And wondering whether I am going to fit into my wedding dress doesn’t help… I keep thinking i am going to gain weight somehow over the next few months and my dress isn’t going to fit. But i know worrying won’t help. I’m just in such a weird place with my body right now. I need to adopt your mindset and just say, Hey, I love my body, and that should be good enough for everyone else. Thanks for sharing this! I need to do some deep thinking now about how i truly think about my weight.

    • Hey girl! Here’s the thing – it’s always a choice. And there’s still days where I don’t choose to love my body and anxious, hateful thoughts about my body seep in. It’s always a process, so even the fact that you’re saying you want to make a change is inviting the choice to happen! And that GREAT!!

      Something I just started trying today but already love is just taking it hour by hour. So maybe you’ll say “for the next hour I’m gonna feel good about my body. And then I can reevaluate in another hour.” Chances are you’ll either start feeling amazing, or you’ll forget to reevaluate in an hour haha. Either way it’s a positive step forward! <3

  • Alicia Brandon Thomas

    Love this post and LOVE you, Sweet-Puh-tay-tuh!!! You’re an inspiration to your Momma! MMMMMWAH!!

  • Dalene Ekirapa

    It is so good to love oneself. I remember there was a time I used to have trouble with accepting my tall and petite body, I could really eat with the aim of adding some meat to my bones but I bet all the weight just went to my bones leaving me still as petite. So the only option left was to love the petite me and yeah, I learnt how to dress my body so well that I gained so much confidence that people even admire it. We are just beautiful as we are!

    • YAAS!! That’s definitely a motivator to love yourself – the sooner you do so, the sooner you learn how to dress yourself well! 🙂

  • Sepideh

    LOVE THIS ASHA!!!!!!

    Dieting SUCKS so I try to look at it as a lifestyle change – something that’s healthy and sustainable. I want my body to be HEALTHY but I also want to be happy and enjoy life!!! So it’s all about figuring out a balance and having a healthy nutrition (I don’t even want to use the word ‘diet’!)

    I also realized very recently that just because I choose to love my body as it is now doesn’t mean that I can’t ALSO be working towards a fitness goal!!


    • YES SEPPY YES! I mean we don’t say we hate our minds just because we are getting an education, so why do we say it about our bodies just because we are trying to be healthy?!

  • I love this I love this I love this I love this I love this I love this I love this.

    a. Screw society and it’s beauty standards ON SO MANY LEVELS. Seriously. UGH!
    b. The mental toll of being overweight, lumpy, gangly, pale, whatever-your-beef-is, is arguably more detrimental to your wellbeing than any health effects that may come from your ailment. Sure, overweight might bring on hypertension. But depression and self-hate is much scarier to me.
    c. DIETS DO SUCK!!! They bring rules. Rules bring restriction. Restriction brings cheat days. Cheat days bring guilt. Guilt brings self-hate. Self-hate brings falling off the wagon. Falling off the wagon may lead to more weight gain. The cycle repeats.

    Enjoy foods you love in moderation. Pay attention to your body’s hunger cues – eat when you’re hungry, stop when you’re full. Fuel up on fruits and veggies, but don’t be afraid of butter, whipped cream, chocolate, potato chips, etc…Just be mindful of how much you eat. Don’t restrict yourself.



    • Wow I love how you said that your self-hate is more harmful to your health than any of the negative health benefits of your body beef. That is SO powerful to remember, and I actually think it is helpful to actually making positive changes in your health! When you can come at your body with love and appreciation, you will actually be far kinder to yourself in the process. And a journey of love is always so much more impactful than one of hate!

  • The Squatty potty is interesting. Lots of good reviews!!

    I totally agree with your view on self-love. The past few months I’ve been losing weight (around 15 pounds lost so far), and part of the reason why I think I’ve been so successful is because I’m not restricting myself from eating certain things. I’m letting myself eat whatever I want as long as I keep it in moderation 🙂 I’m not “dieting” but making a permanent lifestyle change.

    I’m still working on loving my body, but I definitely feel better about it then in October. I also just finished up therapy at my school and I feel like that’s help too.

    • Hey, Veronica! First off, congratulations on the weight loss so far! I know how hard it can be – I’ve struggled with weight my whole life, have gained 20, lost 15, gained 30, lost 5, gained 50….you get the idea. In my personal experience, the idea of “dieting” as we know it is all screwed up. We create rules for ourselves and say that we can’t have carbs, we can’t have chocolate, we can’t have the things that we like – and that only makes us want them more. That leads to “cheat days” (where you’re basically just telling yourself that what you’re doing is wrong and you should feel guilty…a terrible way to approach the day), which usually leads to falling off the wagon all together, feeling like a guilty failure, and giving up.

      Long story short, you are doing it right. Life isn’t about restricting yourself from the things you love just to get your body to a certain size. It’s about moderation. Enjoy that things you love! Have chocolate every day if you want (meeeee)! Listen to your body’s cues on hunger, pat attention to portion sizes, and live your life.

      You might not be where you want to be right now with your body, but you said it yourself – you love it better than you did in October! That’s progress, and that’s absolutely amazing! Not a lot of women can even say that their self-love has improved. Keep up with it and you’ll reach your goals, all while enjoying things you love and finding your way to a healthier lifestyle.



      • Thank you for your lovely comment 🙂 Just subscribed to your blog!

      • Amy YOU ARE SO AMAZING! Thank you for sharing your positivity and motivation with other people!! 🙂

    • Veronica- congrats on your weight loss! That’s amazing! And also congrats to you for seeking out therapy. That’s such a powerful positive change to make!

      • Thank you 🙂 I’ve definitely noticed a difference in myself over the past few months. I don’t understand why therapy is stigmatized, like its “bad” b/c its not. You just have to find the right therapist and keep an open mind.